untuk bebudak smkcs sahaja.

korang, bila kita nak jumpa nih. rindulaa nak jumpa. plan punya plan asyik tak jadi jer. aku paham, memasing ada komitmen. coz aku pun sama. betul orang kata. dah kawin nih lain. nak kena consider husband, anak, family. kalau ada peluang, memang aku nak melawat korang. aku suka jer lepak2 rumah orang nih. i mean potluckla. bukan datang kosong. dun worry. hehe. borak2 makan2 borak2 lagi. nak cukupkan korum kemain susah. kengkadang 3 on, 3 tak dapat pulak. nak plan satu hal pulak. kengkadang agenda punyalaa banyak sampai tak tau yang mana nak buat. ada yang nak karok, ada yang nak tengok movie, ada yang nak window shopping, ada yang nak chill di rumah sajer. tapi kalau tak ikut selera janganlaa sentap2. mana2 pun no hal, janji jumpa. bukan korang, akulaa.

mungkin ada yang tak kisah tak jumpa kengkawan pun takpe. tapi aku kisah. bagi aku family n kawan sama2 penting. korang jelaa kawan aku bergumbira. tengok, sampai aku buat custom made calender letak gambar korang tau. (sory maya, gambar ko takde coz masa tuh ko sampai lambat) bukan sebulan, dua bulan lagi tau. nih lusa dah nak masuk june. tinggal besok jer nak tenung gambar korang nih.

seee...aku sanggup letak gambar tombam tau...

seee....apa? taknak jumpa? nak sentaplaa...waaaa...

sahurapan

pagi tadi ada husband n wife nih bangun sahur kul 5.15am sebab masing2 dah niat nak posa. husband tolong goreng patty burger marina yang dah lama dia idam. wife siap2kan meja, roti, air milo. pastu sapu2 butter, letak mayonis, sos, ngap, nom nom nom. mata khusyuk tengok tv sambil ngunyah. suddenly, sayup2 bunyi.....azan. dalam mulut tengah kunyah, milo belum hirup lagi. tekak belum bilas ngan air kosong lagi...

"kita puasa khamis jelaa yang..."
"ok"

pastu diorang teruskan SARAPAN. bukan sahur yer. sekarang, perut wife rasa sebu. tekak rasa loya. mata kelat. ngantuk. camna?

tak sukalaa rasa macam ni wei...

lately i feel lost. deep in my heart rasa macam ada jer yang tak kena. ntahla. macam ada benda tak siap/tak complete/tak bagus. korang pernah rasa macam tuh tak? i told that to alan but he said maybe because i didn't get to watch glee this week. pffttt. apa kena mengena pulak kan? but, when come to think about it mungkin jugak.

i mean its not the end of the world la kalau tak tengok tv pun but my schedule this week have been a chaos. i didn't go back home as usual, didn't pick up ariana as usual, skipped a few dinner, missed a few favourite tv show (not that i really care pun), but i used to do things on scheduled. i mean, i usually have tons and tons of list things to do in my hp. things to buy, things to pay monthly, things to do when i'm rich. ehh. i even hav my escape plan kalau sentap ngan alan. hehehe. nak tipu pun kena plan kalau tak, tak jadi.

i'm not good at handling urgent/ emergency things. and that's what happen on monday. remember? besides that this week i also received a few bad news. like my tokwan, my bff's miscarriage, my lil ariana demam on and off. even this morning i came late to the office to bring ariana to see paed coz last nite her fever shoot up to 39.8 degree. tido pun tak cukup nih. haiz, banyaknyer merungut!!! tak suka!!! tak suka rasa macam nih lama2. hopefully everything will turn out fine...

...or i'm the one who will collapse.

what we do on sunday

ok, tadi dah janji nak up entry on sunday kan. tapi sorry pic quality tak brape coz pakai camera hp jer. my camera battery kong pulak. so, here it is :

persidangan mesyuarat perwakilan UMNO bahagian setiawangsa

muka glowing *ehem* ketua puteri cawangan klsc (thanks to the yellow light).

perwakilan cawangan aku. from left: me, imah, zana, lia n yanie. budak berdua tuh sibuk berchit chat. lagi dua khusyuk. syabbas betty...

with naib ketua : imah

the souvenirs we get. beg long*fake*champ ko!!

berderet. fake pun fakelaa. i loike!! beg baru, sapa tak suka?

the VIPs in the middle : dato seri zulhasanan n wife datin ana. she's gorgeous. suka tengok baju dia, mekap dia. cantek!!

wanita2

puteries

ajk mesyuarat puteri. patutnya aku pun dok kat stage tapi aku tak tau. dah half way diorang suh aku naik, malu malaslaa...

bila mau makan nih. lapaaaaarrrr....

again, sebab lighting sangat memberangsangkan untuk vain. hiks.

and lastly...

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budak baru lepas ngamuk coz kena tinggal.

dah tu jer.

buntu fikiran

these few days have been a hectic. at least for me. i dun even remember what i do on saturday. what i remember is i have been to GH every day except sunday to visit my tokwan. thanks to my superior for being so understanding when i get back to the office way later than i supposed to and when i need to go back early to catch the visiting hour in the afternoon. on sunday i had this umno conference thingy that i have to attend (i will post an entry later about it) from morning till 2pm. by the time i reach home, i was so exhausted i just rest at my mom's as alan n ariana are also there.

on monday morning i can feel that my body aching but i force myself to get up and bathe. and guess what? a rat came out from the back of the basin and ran around the bathroom. i was screaming at the top of my lungs while yank open the bathroom door so that it would get out but hey, why must the rat get out when it can hav more fun with this lady ey? stupid rat ran back to the back of the basin and hide in a hole behind it where nobody can reach it. so i have to continue bathing with the door open and my eyes fix to the hole. and because of my reflex action, my right side of the body aching even more. so i decide to take mc. BUT the doctor told me that its just a muscle pain. i should be able to work coz "i work in the office, not hard labour". i said i still need the mc as it was already 11am and he said ok, but next time cannot. pffftttt what everla.

But mc pun tak rehat coz I have to go to GH after receive sms about tokwan being critical. thats the 1st time i drive our new mpv. menggigil jugak nak masuk town dengan mpv nih. parking susah giler. masuk a few parking spot takde gak kosong. i almost ran over a pakcik on his bike. SORRY PAKCIK. i even drive over a divider while make a turn. luckily no scratch. lastly i park beside a construction site and leave my number on the wind screen and when i went back my car have been clamped. bayar jela RM50. then after maghrib I receive another sms as tokwan is critical again. alan had to cancel his tuisyen class to take care ariana.

on tuesday pulak i came to the office and a branch called said that we lost his clients cheques. Supposedly dah sampai HR tapi takde. come onlaa...i dun need this kind of thing at this time. We tried to trace step by step but then buntu. Macamana cheque boleh hilang nih? n gd3x said they didn’t send any docs to the company. And my colleague pulak takde rekod whether we send out ke tak. So, aku ker yang tak pass kat mailing? Habis tuh mana? menggagau carik 1 ofis. Semua pun carik kat tempat masing2 mana tau terselit bawah dapur. eh. and this morning the HR called balik bagitau dah jumpa pulak. hampeh tul.

As for now my tokwan still at GH. weak but stable. his oxigen and sugar level in his blood was very low. He’s not allowed to eat or drink. Sian atok. He’s thirsty but we only allowed to drip a few drop of water just to wet his lips. Luckily we have a big family. We rotate to take care atok. but I’m a bit sad I couldn’t take part coz beranak kecik. I would go there whenever I got the chance. guys, please pray for my atok ye.

multitasking

i like to multitask. at the office, i would open a few windows ; work related, entertainment i.e blogs, info i.e googling stuff, games, and stupid system. why? because of the stupid system that we use that keep loading for 10-15 seconds every single time we click it. every transaction or process we need to click at least 10-15 times to get the result so you do the math. that's y. 10-15 seconds is very valuable for a very busy (ehem) person like me. those 15 seconds i could type a sentence in my blog. or while its loading, i could play a step for spider solitaire or winlinez. i could also delete/re arrange my emails, i could read a blog, i could run to the photocopy machine, i could fax, the list go on and on.

at home i would boil water while cook ariana's porridge while laundry while making the bed. then i would sweep the floor or wash the bottles while kejap2 lari pegi kacau bubur. alan will help me to babysit ariana coz that's the only way i can do the work peacefully. i used to brag to alan how fast i can do housechores. hehe. actually tak guna pun brag coz i think its women's thing to multitask. but what most people dunno is that i tend to be clumsier (means at normal pace pun memang dah clumsy) when i'm in a hurry. i ended up doing more work than what i supposed to do. more spills, more things drop from my hand, have to swipe the food off the floor, re cook the porridge coz its burnt akibat leka, bla bla bla.

nowadays 24 hours seems not enough. evrything must be done quickly. just look at those contestants in masterchef sudah. saspen tengok diorang sebelah tangan kacau ini, sebelah lagi kacau itu, sambil goreng nih, blend ini, cincang itu. no wonder ramai yang cedera at the 1st round. sapa tengok masterchef US harituh? paling rimas tengok mike tuh. kelam kabut sungguh. i like the winner. sapa nama dia? yang budak southern tuh. tak ingatla. cool jer. kalau bz pun dia focus giler. takde pun lari lintang pukang. very humble. memang puas hatilaa dia menang. yg 2nd place tuh berlagak. dari awal lagi. muka smirk jer. senyum eksyen. eh, aku nak citer pasal multitasking nih melalut ke masterchef plak. multi entry lak. hehe.

nih pun tengah buat keje gak nih while typing nih. aku rasa women memang tererlaa multitasking nih sumer kan? just look at housewives. i salute all housewives coz they can handle the children, while doing housechores on DAILY BASIS. aku yang jadi housewife on weekend pun dah tak larat. 2 hari cukupla nak mengemas segala. lebih2, aku kiv kan ajer.

p/s : Alhamdulillah atok dah makin stabil. tadi pegi hospital dia dah mula cakap2. cakap banyak lak tuh. hehehe. katanya nak makan pecal bila dah sembuh. nak "sapu" semua. cewah...

doakan atok aku yer...

hi all,

teringin nak update blog tapi takde masa. keje tengah banyak n atok aku masuk hospital since semalam. i've been going back n forth from office to GH to visit him. sadly his internal organs started to failing. he look soooo weak. doakan atok cepat sembuh atau...sekurang2nya dia tak menderita sakit. kesian tengok atok macam nih. selalunya dialaa yang paling ceria. mengusik, menyakat walaupun kengkadang aku mengamuk. nih terbaring kat katil. nak bukak mata pun payah. dia cuma boleh angguk sikit2 jer tanda faham apa kita cakap. doktor pulak cucuk macam2 tiub kat tangan kiri dan kanan. habis berdarah2 cadar. isyh, nak cerita banyak2 pun sedihlaa...

i love you atok.

aku tak nak sama ngan orang lain buleh?!!!

sebenarnya nak ucap selamat hari guru tapi konon tak nak klise. rata2 bukak blog harini semua tajuk cam sama jer. huhu. tapi niatnyer tetap sama, nak ucap tima kasih cikgu, tima kasih banyak2. walaupun saya keje sekarang tak related langsung ngan pembelajaran saya kat U, tapi sebahagian daripada diri saya adalah hasil didikan cikgu2 semua.

Kalau nak disenaraikan terlalu banyak cikgu2 yang nak disebut. Alhamdulillah, setakat nih saya masih menjadi orang. masa sekolah pun saya seorang yang biasa2 ajer, tak pernah buat kesah (buat hal) tapi tak pernah pulak jadi best student. memang biasa ajer saya nih. nak cerita pun takde kenangan yang ganas2 seperti membuli orang, mencukur kening, bergaduh rebut kekasih lesbian, cukur kepala ala pengkid, ponteng kelas, curi keluar sekolah, pancitkan keta cikgu atau kena denda berdiri luar kelas. paling tidak pun setakat tak bawak buku jer. itupun kena denda berdiri belakang kelas jer. best jugak skali skala kena denda eh. tapi saya kena buli tuh adalaa sikit2. tapi takpe, lumrah hidup. yang miskin kena buli ngan yang kaya. eh, teremosi pulak.

Mungkin jugak cikgu2 tak ingat saya tapi saya ingat cikgu2. saya nak wish SELAMAT HARI GURU untuk semua cikgi2 (aku sekolah pompuan 11 tahun tak pernah ada cikgu lelaki kat sekolah, setakat cikgu2 praktikal adalaa...) dan lecturers yang mengajar aku dari aku mula kenal sekolah sampailaa sekarang. dari aku sekolah kat tadika St. Ronan, SRK Convent Sentul 1, SMK Convent Sentul, Matriks UUM sampai UUM.

tapi yang paling special skali aku nak ucapkan HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY buat cikgu yang paling aku sayang, Cikgu Azlan Muhamad Ali merangkap cikgu cinta ai. huhu.

another week goes by....

phew, what a weekend...hahaha...actually takde apa pun. on saturday pegi visit 1 of my best fren that just give birth last week. then petang we should go to our neighbour's doter's wedding but ariana pulak tido. tak sampai hati nak kejut after i force her to follow me earlier that day. so, i cooked instant pasta for me n ariana as alan pulak nak makan megi jer. malam tuh 3 beranak yang kebulur nih pegi rumah my mom to eat dinner. haha pemalasnyer bini alan. then on sunday my kazen pulak nikah. we manage to see the solemnization at the masjid n then head to her aunt's house where the food was served. sedapnyer....lama tak makan masakan rumah yang best camnih. oh, pegi rumah my mom tuh goreng telur jer coz datang adhoc plus my mom masak simple jer aka sayur which alan tak makan. memang sajer tak bagitau taknak susahkan dia. lagipun nak bawak ariana jumpa aunty2 n nenda jer niat asal kitorang. (ehem)

then shoot pegi rumah ayahteh kat kajang to visit my tokwan. kesian tok dah 2 hari tak sihat. tak lalu makan. demam kejap naik, kejap kebah. tadi tgk dia pun dah uzur sangat. he's 90 tau. i'm thankful i still have atok. atok dapat tgk ariana. dia nangis. dia kata dia tak lalu makan. well, ramai datang tadi n advise him to eat at least sikit so that dia boleh makan ubat, n get well soon.

as for tomorrow, i have to work as half of the office is taking leave. hmmmph...or shud i take emergency leave? alaa...keje tak banyak pun tapi malasnya nak menjawab call bagi pihak orang2 yang cuti nih. alan lak ada sambutan hari guru. tema merah biru. dia pakai biru coz takde baju merah. hmmmm....shud buy him one, dontcha think? tuesday plak me n the girls had a girls day out plan...yehoooo....lama tak jumpa...ingat nak karok tapi ada orang tuh kan dia kata dia dah bosan karok. well, SAPA SURUH KO KAROK TAK AJAK KITORANG? tak kira. ikut majoriti yer...

p/s : gambar ada tapi tak cantik coz my kamera tak bekerjasama dengan baik. maybe after i get it from the others eh

nampak sangat ko lambat g opis eh alin!

pagi tadi sambil bersiap aku bukak hotfm. tetiba dengar lagu nih terus teringat ariana yang dah dihantar ke babysitter. rasa rindu plak. maybe bcoz last nite dia tido awal. before 8pm dah tido terus sampai 7.30 pagi tadi. adalaa bangun2 jap menyusu tapi tak sempat nak main2 dengan dia dah kena hantar balik. so ariana, this song is for you.

Sempurna- Andra and The Backbones

Kau begitu sempurna
Dimataku kau begitu indah
kau membuat diriku akan slalu memujimu
Disetiap langkahku
Kukan slalu memikirkan dirimu
Tak bisa kubayangkan hidupku tanpa cintamu

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

Reff:Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku
Lengkapi diriku
Oh sayangku, kau begitu
Sempurna.. Sempurna..

Kau genggam tanganku
Saat diriku lemah dan terjatuh
Kau bisikkan kata dan hapus semua sesalku

Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa

Reff:Kau adalah darahku
Kau adalah jantungku
Kau adalah hidupku
Lengkapi diriku
Oh sayangku, kau begitu
Sempurna.. Sempurna..

p/s : actually hari2 dengar lagu nih coz its one of my colleague's ringtone. tapi ntah baru pagi tadi menusuk ke hati. ececeh...

Wordless Wednesday : 15 months old and her electronic game

Anda Mama yang Mana???

selama nih aku dok ngomel jer. takde pun nak buat entry yang berilmiah yang boleh buat orang berpikir skali skala. apadaa...ok, harituh aku ada baca entry kak ayu (blog doa buat alanna). interesting. tapi aku rasa kalau kita sendiri jawab mungkin tak tepat. better tanya husband. so, korang kategori mana?

Menurut seorang ahli psikologi barat, Stephen B. Poulter,secara ringkasnya terdapat 5 kategori ibu dalam mendidik dan membesarkan anak-anaknya...dan ditambah 1 kategori lagi by kak ayu :

1. MAMA SERBA SEMPURNA

Mahu segalanya dilaksanakan sempurna di mata: suami, anak--anak dan rumahtangga. (Dari langsir, baju raya....kuih raya...Nuggets, yogurt...semua buat sendiri...Homemade!!!)

2. MAMA SUKAR DIJANGKA

Memang dia suka mencipta situasi kurang senang di kalangan anak-anak. Mood-nya yang sekejap bagus, boleh pula bertukar sekelip mata?? Bahaya. Sengsara anak-anak dibuatnya. (i know somebody in this kategori...)

3. MAMA ' AKU YANG UTAMA'

Dia mementingkan diri sendiri. Kerjaya dan kejayaan diri paling diutamakan. Anak-anak?? Oh...orang gaji ada...anak jatuh nombor 2. (yang ni byk tengok dlm drama jer)

4. MAMA PENYELENGGARA

Dia mendidik anak-anaknya dengan pengetahuan lengkap agar tidak tercicir dalam pancaroba duniawi. (Mama jenis ni selalunya kawan baik dengan makcik google...:P )

5. DIA SAHABAT, DIA MAMA

Seronok mendapat ibu jenis ini. Segala masalah boleh dikongsi bersama.... (mama idaman semua)

6. KIASU MAMA ( 'taknak kalah' mama)

KIASU- (kee-ah-soo)Kiasu dalam bahasa Hokkien membawa maksud, takut kalah atau tidak mahu kalah.

Mama jenis ini pantang menyerah. Akan sentiasa alert dengan perkembangan mama-mama lain disekelilingnya.Pantang dengar anak mama lain lebih sikit. Dia pun seboleh-bolehnya nak buat sama untuk anak dia. Tak salahkan??

Contoh :-
a) Dapat tahu, anak mama A tuh pakai botol susuJenama XXX. Botol jenama tuh bagus. So Kiasu mama ni pun nak jugak...hihi.
b) Dapat tahu, anak mama B tuh pandai sangat dalam maths.So Kiasu mama ni pun terus pergi kedai beli banyak buku latihan.Nak suruh anak dia buat latihan banyak-banyak.
c) Dapat tahu anak mama C tuh, 4 tahun dan masuk Taekwando class. So Kiasu mama ni pun cepat2 masukkan anak dia...

aku belum tanya alan lagi tapi mungkin aku dalam kategori mama penyelenggara kot eventhough i really hope to be mama sahabat. what about you?

takde citer apapun. pasal our weekend jer...

last week asyik nak marah2 jer. agaknya korang pikir apekehal alin nih. tapi sekarang dah tak marah2 lagi. pasal 2 beradik lemas tuh, aku tumpang sedih. tengok gambar diorang, teringat anak sendiri. aku rasa most mak2 pun akan rasa macam tuh. kecuali mak2 (boleh panggil mak ker?panggil pompuanla, takpun betty na) yang memang tergamak nak membuang anak tuh. golongan tuh mungkin tak rasa apa2laa...thats y i said MOSTly. its not for evrybody.

ok2, enuf bout that. takmo marah2 dah. i have a lot to be grateful. firstly ariana dah fully recover. no more vomit, no more diarhea. oh, aku tak sempat citer yang on thursday harituh my aunty called me and said ariana vomit after most of her meal, and she got diarhea about 5 times on that day. as i dunno any paed that opens after office hour, my colleague suggested i go to Klinik Kanak2 Ong at ampang. it is at Ampang Point area, alongside with kenny rogers. u cud see the kenny rogers from the main road. deret rhb gak. after work, i went home, pack some things-pampers, milk, wipes, the usual a mummy would bring and fetch ariana on the way to the clinic.

the doc said she probably ate something that upset her stomache and that day it got worsen and that's why it started the diarhea. he gave us prebiotik-good bacteria to fight those bad bacteria, ubat muntah, smecta-to repair her stomache after several times poo poo and few sample of pediasure to increase her body weight. he said ariana is underweight. i tried to giv her the milk. it tasted yummy with vanilla flavor but she refuse to take it. i giv her her own milk but she refuse it too. maybe she tot that i tried to persuade her the vanilla milk again. kesian dia. since 6.30pm her last milk, at 11pm baru dia nak susu. itupun dia minum 2oz jer. then middle of the nite 2 oz lagi. she really likes the prebiotik tho. tak payah susah2 nak paksa dia telan. she's willingly open her mouth and suck the syringe macam tak cukup pulak. it taste like concentrated vitagen. sedap jer ubat budak2 nih. oh, i really like the doc as he explained very clear the things we laymen don't understand. i would definitely make it as my panel after this. not that i hope ariana would get sick, but u know what i mean, rite?

on friday ariana langsung tak muntah n diarhea. lega. on saturday, we just lazing around as alan have to go to school. ada sekolah ganti pulak. petang tuh after alan came home, we went to the tailor at kg. padang balang to book our baju kurung for raya and kenduri. this is the 1st time ariana book a baju kurung because i don't think that i could ever find a grey baju kurung for baby. yepp, thats our theme this year. so dull...well i'll have to make it not dull by adding a little color to it. we'll see...(i wanna upload a few pic but hav to wait for alan to transfer them from his hp to my thumbdrive)

and on sunday we go to alpha angle for lunch where ariana bought me a flower. awwww (ehem, thanks hub) and we head off to my aunty's house at rawang. at first we wanna use our gps but since the gps couldn't set the address, we just ask my uncle. i just found out that when u wanna type the address, the gps will disable a few next alphabets to match the directory in their system. sangat keciwa. but its ok, the direction my uncle gave is clear and we reach there within 45 minutes.

balik jer rumah ariana terpengsan tido coz siang tuh dia cuma dapat nap tak sampai sejam. kitorang pun tumpanglaa lelap sebelah dia. sedar2 dah pukul 8pm! we only had burgers and the bread pudding that i baked earlier that day for dinner. yumm...

PUAS!!!

pernah tak korang marah sangat kat orang tuh rasa macam nak marah,
tengking kaw2 depan muka dia pastu korang mesti nak orang2 sekeliling sokong korang kan?

TAPI, sebab kengkadang kita terpikir, macamana kalau benda tuh jadi kat aku?
and korang taknak kerna bad karma/tulah/roda pusing/whatsoever,
korang takleh laa nak lepaskan marah.
well, lepaskan marah kat blog tak dikira eh.

so, korang pun macam makan hati cicah sos sikit demi sikit sebab pendam perasaan.
pernah tak?
well, aku pernah.
and bangun pagi tadi aku rasa relieve sangat.
rasa macam keluar semua apa yang aku pendam.
nak tau rahsianya?

bukan...bukan yang awak maafkan semua orang sebelum tido tuh...
itu tak jalan ngan aku...
tapi cara nih aku tak tau camna nak trigger. cuma aku boleh cakap memang puaslah!!
aku.....






MIMPI!


aku mimpi aku marah2 dia, tengking kaw2, siap gaduh2, dia nangis, orang semua sokong aku.
dan sekarang aku dah tak marah dia dah.
aku kira setellaa.
eh, tapi dia tak tau aku memendam rasa.
tak kisahlaa.
janji aku tau aku dah rasa

BEBAS...

baca paper nak ngamuk

this morning i read about 3 girls a little older than ariana probably drown. ok, taknak speaking dah. nak venting nih. kena bahasa ibunda+rojak. baru puas. sapa tak suka, jangan teruskan pembacaan coz aku nak ngamuk, nak lepaskan marah. so, jangan nak marah aku balik kalau aku guna bahasa kasar k.

ok, aku assume korang dah baca berita 3 beradik yang lemas tuh. yang pergi berkelah ngan bapak n gf bapaknya. yang aku tak puas hati, kenapa bapak dia bodoh sangat pegi bawak budak2 mandi sungai dah tau musim hujan? kalau ye pun nak anak2 bermesra2 dengan bakal mak tiri, ko bawaklaa pegi tempat kanak2. taman tema melambak. padang mainan melambak. pusat hiburan kanak2 pun melambak. apa ke bangang sangat ko ni haa bapak? oh, ko nak jimat eh. bawak gi mandi sungai takyah bayar, free. setakat bawak sandwich sardin sebungkus dah kenyang. ko pun boleh mengulit gf ko bawah pokok sesambil tengok anak2 ko main air eh?wei, pikir guna otaklaa wei. 2-5 years old tuh kecik sangat nak mandi sunagi. ko takkan mampu jaga unless adult lebih ramai dari kanak2. sorang jaga 1. paham?

aku boleh bayangkan tapi aku tak boleh nak rasa macamana perasaan mak diorang. bebudak tuh sihat walafiat dia hantar ke rumah mertua sebab tak nak putuskan silaturrahim. yang ko sesedap rasa jer bawak keluar tanpa inform mak dia. ko mesti kecut kot3 coz ko kan nak bawak gi jumpa gf. takkan mak diorang benarkan punya. aku nak salahkan lelaki kang ramai lak lelaki yang datang belasah aku kat sini. tapi, mak2 nih membebel bersebab. coz women tend to think negatively unlike men who take things easy. ini situasi yang dapat aku pikirkan

kalau mak ada, mak takkan mandi coz mata melilau nak tengok barang, nak perhati anak2, anak2 kecil main kat gigi2 air setakat cecah buku lali jer.

bapak pulak, jom2 kita gi tgh sikit. bapak dukung. kiri sorang, kanan sorang. gf peluk pinggang kuat2 sambil pegang yang besar. wtf.

tengok, ko kuat sangat ker? dengan ngko, ngan gf ko skali hanyut. sebab ko besar, senang untuk orang ramai selamatkan, tapi bebudak tuh? tenggelam timbul pun tidak, macamana nak terkapai2, yang 2 tahun tuh? seriously, sambil taip nih pun mata aku dah bergenang. sekelip mata semuanya dah takde. aku doubt bapak diorang lebih sedih dari mak diorang. menyesal tak sudah, mungkin. aku doakan semoga mak bebudak tuh kuat semangat, kuat iman menerima qada dan qadar Allah.

huh, aku cakap nih macam tak selari pulak. marah2 macam tak redha tapi lepas tuh kena terima ketentuan Allah pulak. ok, bagi aku, memang ajal maut dah ditentukan. same goes as rezeki. TAPI, kita jugak kena berusaha, prevent benda2 bahaya. contohlaa eh. katakan A ada barah. doktor kata ada 2 tahun jer lagi nak hidup. pastu? ko takyah gi berubatlaa? ko still kena cuba hidup selama mana yang boleh. pegi kemo, makan ubat, jumpa doktor. contoh B. perlu ker ko nak terjun bangunan sebab nak test, ajal ko dah sampai ke belum. contoh C macam yang jadi nilaa. ko dah tau bahaya, ko boleh nak amik risiko bawak bebudak mandi sungai lagi? ni yang aku marah sangat nih coz diorang sangat kecik yang memang tak tau nak jaga diri sendiri. kencing berak pun taktau basuh lagi. kalau dah sekolah tuh, larang2 pergi jugak, lain cerita. kamonlaa...tapi yang pasti, diorang semua tuh konfem jadi bidadari syurga. itu janji Allah.

AFTER that scary moments...

since the incident in wangsa walk the other day, ariana have been vomits after mikl at 5am yesterday and 6am this morning. i dun understand why coz all this while she consume her milk with no problem at all. we only feed her 6oz of milk every 2-3 hours. its not too much for her age as other babies at that age would take about 9-10oz per serving. at first she would cry for her milk then i will wake up and prepare it then after halfway thru, she would crinkle her brows then rejected it. then she would cry and i just dunno what to do. the milk was as usual. not warmer nor colder. i tried to rub the ointment to her stomache, change her diaper and that won't stop her cry as well. then she suddenly stop crying, look blank and blurt out the milk.

this morning, i have prepared a plastic bag just in case. well mother's instinct usually correct. unlike yesterday, the whole bedsheet and myself had vomits all over the place. the doctor only give us medicine to stop the vomit and a few sachet of O.R to rehydrate her body. other than that she's just happy an active as usual. hmmm...should i be worried or i'm just paranoid? my poor baby. i really hope that we somehow could communicate then maybe i could understand what she's been going thru. i don't mind she's late to walk as old people said a child that speak first will walk later than the rest. i don't mind that.

weekend and THAT scary moment

phewww, what a weekend. well, actually my weekend are not THAT exciting. just the normal stuff. eating, watching tv, lepaking. on saturday went to a wedding with my parents in law and met my father n my aunty n my other siblings. what a small world. not because we met at the wedding coz we kinda DID plan to meet up. but it is the coincidence that the bride's mom is both my MIL's and my father's fren. she is my mil's school fren and my father's ex-colleague. you see, when i n alan going to get married, she received invitation cards from both of our sides. so she called my mil and inform this. since then whenever my mil talk about her, she would remind who she was. "acik zailan, ko kenal kan? alaa, yang keje sama ngan abah ko tuh...yang bla bla bla..." (errmmm, my mil likes to rererepeat things over and over no matter you've heard it or not) sometimes its kinda cute. ok, enuf bout that.

and that afternoon my in laws all went back to melaka coz they need to send alan's sister to muar the next morning. then alan also have to go to his school coz he have this co-curiculum things going on and he will only be back on sunday noon. so i drove me and ariana to my mom's and have a sleepover. on sunday, we didn't go anywhere except for a late dinner after we battle with ariana's constipation. poor baby. on saturday she didn't poop at all and i kinda guessed that she will hav problems the next day. i have feed her with water, prune juice and papaya. it took her the whole day to squeeze those BIG bombs one at a time. 1 in the morning, 1 at noon, 1 before dinner and the last on monday morning (hey, its a song title. monday morning. hehe).

had to carry her and rub her back

poor baby sweating after pooping

after that she's happy just to get hold of that chopstick

mummy, look! i wanna poke the chopstick into my mouth

gotcha! i'm kidding...hehehe....

trying again...

kidding again. hahaha

then on monday after lazing around until 3pm, i decided to go for karaoke. one of our hobbies back when we are two. we only went to wangsa walk as it is the nearest one that i could think of. but eventhough there are 2 karaoke centre, we had to take a number and wait. there's no way we're gonna wait. so we just brought ariana to play on those rides thing. after few rides, we decided to go home. thats when ariana suddenly vomitted her milk and look very pale. outside the building it is heavily raining. ariana look even worst when she vomits again. and this time she looks like she wanna faint. at first i and alan decide to bring her to the nearest clinic but then we change to al-islam specialist instead when her lips turn blueish and her face a bit yellowish. . while in the car, we kept calling her names and checked her heartbeat constantly. all those scary thoughts that i don't even dare to say come into my mind. inside the car she close her eyes and move a bit when we called her names. we don't know if she was fainted or sleeping.


arrived at al-islam, we go straight to the emergency and explained ourselves. the nurse said she probably have to be admitted but i ask ariana to be checked by a doctor before decide on anything. Alhamdulillah, she's actually sleeping because she's a bit weak after vomits several times. doctor said she may eat wrongly (i cooked her lunch, remember? huh. i feel bad) and she will be ok. before we went back she woke up and start chit chatting like there's nothing happen. hisyh, she really make us panicked for a while. i even had tear when i talked to the doctor. i just can't imagine anything bad happen to my baby. like malay says "simpang malaikat 44" don't know why they say that. or the chinese says "touchwood" still don't understand the meaning of it. but still, mintak dijauhkan.